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I opened up the
book of my life
to him
and exposed its
each and every page.
I read out to him loud and clear
the page of my virtues
the page of my talents
the page of my strengths
the page of my joys and
the page of my sorrows.
I did not even think of
or consider
covering up and hiding
the page of my struggles
the page of my vices and
the page of my weakness.
I also without hesitation
read him aloud the
chapters of my pain and
my loneliness
chapters of my confusion
and my unmet expectations.
I could do that only when
I had taken off the armour of
my fear and
my securities
and I was fully aware that
I was making myself vulnerable to
judgment
humiliation
embarrassment
shame and
rejection.
I had a lot at stake.
But even then it was
a risk I wanted to take.
It was a risk worth taking.
For if I won
I would be showered with
an unconditional love and
the bliss that comes with it.
And even in defeat
I would win an opportunity
of exposing me to myself.
For in the process of opening up
the book of my life
and reading it to someone else
I would myself read it
page by page
chapter by chapter
and would know myself
better and closer
and thus win myself
the love from me.
Meenakshi Jha
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